Your hot co-workers: the naked truth

Friday - 7/26/2013, 2:00am EDT

Thanks to the early and extended heat wave steam cooking much of the country, federal fashion police have been on red alert earlier than usual. Normally, office dress standards usually don't hit bottom until mid to late August.

This year, the let-it-all hang out TMI event is already upon us. And if the heat continues, it can only get worse. On Monday, we noted the situation and asked people to give us the naked truth about what people aren't wearing to work.

The TMI visual assault in many offices serves as a distraction from what may be coming this fall: a major assault on federal pay, retirement and health benefits from Congress and the White House. But that probably won't begin until September. In the meantime, the clear-and-present danger for sensitive feds is eye pollution. As co-workers dress down to beat the heat, strange things happen (and are seen) in the office. What some people are not wearing produces a sight that creates, rather than soothes, sore eyes. Here are some comments from victims and observers:

  • "Wow — what a topic that I could go on about. How about the woman in the office who wears black pants with 4 inch tall rhinestone lettering across her behind that says 'sexy' (yes it is true). And, no, she is not.
  • We also have women who wear cocktail dresses to work, and of course, some in their PJs...
  • All of this gives us added security knowing that the guards never see a badge, just the behind of the woman who just walked past them.
  • There is also the guy who looks like he took a break from the basketball game to come to work — in a jersey, shorts and knee socks. "

Another reader agrees that the naked truth has arrived early this year. He recommends managers follow the "three B" rule:

"Normally about June through August, we start getting complaints from managers about the attire of some of their employees, but I always tell them to follow the 'three Bs' (butt crack, belly button and breasts), unless you see any of those being prominently displayed, then there isn't much a manager can do. You're not going to find the average federal employee these days dressed in a three-piece suit and tie or a dress slightly below the knee, pantyhose and closed toe sensible shoes. Those days are long gone, so either learn to adapt or you'll drive yourself nuts." -Grin and Bare It!

And this reader, who pointed out it's not always the ladies who violate the dress code in summer heat:

"I cannot begin to describe how bad it is in my office here in suburban Maryland. Trust me. It is bad. A lot of the complaints are about women and spandex and too-much-information. To which I would ask my colleagues to check out the men. Men who wear tank tops revealing flabby arms and hairy backs. We've also got guys in basketball shorts with long socks. It scares me, and I am a man!" -Ranger Rick


NEARLY USELESS FACTOID

Compiled by Nicole Ogrysko

Watch your mouth! In China, it was socially acceptable to spit in public until 2003, when fear of the SARS outbreak prompted the Chinese to fine anyone caught in the act.

Source: Mental Floss


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