Shows & Panels
- The 2014 Big Picture on Cyber Security
- AFCEA Answers
- Ask the CIO
- Connected Government
- Consolidating Mission-critical Systems
- Constituent Servicing
- Continuous Monitoring: Tools and Techniques for Trustworthy Government IT
- The Data Privacy Imperative: Safeguarding Sensitive Data
- Eliminating the Pitfalls: Steps to Virtualization in Government
- Federal Executive Forum
- Federal Tech Talk
- Government Cloud Brokerage: Who, What, When, Where, Why?
- Government Mobility
- Mission-critical Apps in the Cloud
- Mobile Device Management
- The Modern Federal Threat Landscape
- The Path from Legacy Systems
- Understanding the Intersection of Customer Service and Security in the Cloud
Shows & Panels
Washington's weather wimps bite back
Tuesday - 1/24/2012, 2:00am EST
The decision to delay the opening of government offices Monday — because of ice and fog — provides excellent fodder for editorial writers around the country. Broadcasters paid to be 'funny' will take a shot or two at the delayed arrival. Especially if they are in places like Green Bay or Syracuse. Or cities like Chicago, Boston and Buffalo where people know how to drive.
But for those of us who live here in this very hilly, river city Monday's call was a blessing. Especially for those (like me) who had to come in especially early. We got very lucky because one of the two largest suburban counties (Montgomery County in Maryland) had a professional day. That meant the staff worked, but tens of thousands of kids didn't have to be transported by bus, van or SUV. That took a lot of traffic off the road.
Washington probably has more people living here who didn't grow up here than most other cities. (I was born in sunny Indianapolis, Ind. where men are men and women drive snowplows!)
We have a large population of carpetbaggers because this is the seat of government and lots of people come here to work. Politicians make careers out of running against the waste, fraud and abuse of Washington, D.C. and spend millions of dollars so they can get reelected to they can live and work in what they describe as cesspool. Their selflessness knows no bounds!
A friend, originally from St. Louis, says that many people here suffer from false memories of their youth. He says that many recall walking miles to school in blizzards. Of never having a school shut down for any reason. When they came here, he says, they left two things at home: Their youth and their ability to drive. Our hills, traffic circles, diplomats and transplanted drivers are too much for them.
A friend and I once pushed a small rear-engine drive car out of a snowbank on a hill on 30th street N.W., in Georgetown. The car had Massachusetts tags. So he had seen snow before. Yet he got stuck, like a lot of people, that winter. We laughed about it. He said D.C. snow seemed wetter than it was in Boston. Great laugh. Great attitude. I can see why Sen. Ted Kennedy had such a long career.
So if you are watching the weather shenanigans in D.C. with disdain, that's okay.
The decision for a delayed opening here probably prevented a lot of car wrecks, major delays and maybe some traffic fatalities. You can laugh all you want. We are accustomed to it.
One request: We can suffer all the insults about our inability to cope with cold weather. Or, if you are from Houston, New Orleans or Miami, what wimps we are in the summer. Whatever...
But do us a favor, okay. There are 535 people here — all from other places, some from your hometown — that are really problematic. Although designated lawmakers, It seems a lot of them are always getting caught taking bribes, accepting favors, getting sweetheart loans, freebie trips, sometimes with female entertainment thrown in. Or twittering naughty self portraits of themselves to selected constituents. Every now and then, one of two of them gets nailed, sometimes even jailed. But probably not often enough.
So we'll try to do better dealing with adverse weather if you will stop sending, those strange representatives (representative of what?) here.
NEARLY USELESS FACTOID
By Jack Moore
Did you ever wonder what tree rings would sound like if they were cut into LP-sized slices and loaded onto a special record player able to cross-sectional pieces of tree trunks? Wonder no more: Life's Little Mysteries has video.
MORE FROM FEDERAL NEWS RADIO
NSPS is dead...now what?
The Defense Department's long experiment in a pay-for-performance system was supposed to provide a model for the rest of government. Instead, after six years and protracted legal battles, the National Security Personnel System was abolished by Congress. With more than 225,000 employees, who were once covered by the system, now converted back to the General Schedule, Federal News Radio examines the lessons learned and legacy of NSPS.
Postal Service, unions reach impasse in labor talks
Labor talks failed this weekend between the Postal Service and two postal unions - the National Association of Letter Carriers and the National Postal Handlers Union. The contract deadline already has been extended twice.
Air Force: Underperforming programs will suffer in 2013 budget
In next year's budget, key factors for program funding are performance, performance and performance, the Air Force's top acquisition official said.